The Cook of Castamar

I can't think of a better way to escape the heat of Texas than an immersion in this 12-episode series set in 18th century Spain.  

There are so many savable lines I meant to stop and copy, but the plot was so engrossing I didn't take the time. 

As in Downton Abbey, the nobles in Castamar live and socialize in the opulent rooms upstairs, and the servants live downstairs. 

Upstairs, there are truly terrible, self-serving, deceptive, thieving, murderous people who'd do anything to get the money or power they want, but also very kind and good upstairs people.

Downstairs, there are those--especially the cook herself, Clara--who are beams of light, people who are able to forgive "the good people who made mistakes" and to fight for justice after crimes. When the powers that be want to banish and punish a homosexual couple, Clara says, "It's none of my business what people do outside of work hours." 

The good people never try to force anyone to change, but some mean-spirited people are changed just by knowing them.  

At one of the family soirees, someone from downstairs dies, and word gets out from one of the servants.  "Let the party go on" was the sentiment of the duchess-mother and most of the guests.  But her son, the duke, says, "Is this the kind of people we are, Mother?" and declares the party over.

That's the kind of question we ask and hear often in this country in this decade of the 21st century: "Is this the kind of people we are?" 

"Don't push it"

So many things to do, so little time.....

With the recent change in the new COVID variant, and the fact that some are vaccinated, some not, we're back at the stage of not knowing what to do. 

I've been pushing (mentally) to try my trip to Georgia and one to Virginia again,  but it's not happening until there are more indications of safety. "Don't push it," Carlene said. "Phone conversations are almost as good as a visit."

Then I talked to a friend who said her lesson of the week, in other areas, is: "Don't push it.  Let it just happen when the time is right."

I learned that pushing it too hard in physical therapy had backfired and actually slowed my progress.  My doctor said, "Don't push it. Do easy gentle things and you'll get there just as fast." 

I'm finding that I can only do so much on a given day.  When I've done however much that is, I'm done.  I take a nap and watch a couple of episodes of "The Cook of Castamara," a good Spanish series similar to "Downton Abbey" but with subtitles, more sex, and more treachery. 

Luci doesn't put demands on herself, though she does try every trick in the dog book to get me outside to walk and throw a ball.  When I get in the bed, turn off the phone, and take a nap, she's asleep faster than I am.  She's a girl who goes with the flow. 

Wednesday

Today I went to see my surgeon, Dr. Skunda, hoping for a little peace of mind about my progress.  I got that and so much more!

I'd heard my physical therapist say that we needed to "break up all the scar tissue" and I was worried that I'd be one of those who has to go back and have the knee stretched to a 120 bend under anesthesia.  And while I like my therapist, the slow-forced bends have been excruciating, leaving me unable to do much for the rest of the day. 

Dr. Skunda explained that there are two different ways of doing knee surgery.  One takes longer to heal but when it does heal, the knee feels more like a real knee.  The other one heals more quickly--thus the better performance of some patients than others.  

"You're going great!" he said.  I haven't reached 120 yet, but I'm at 112 and he promises that with "gentler exercises" I'd make 120 soon. The dreaded going back to the hospital for a painful manipulation is rarely done and only for patients who can't move beyond 90!

So I came home very happy and the doc is going to call the therapist and tell him that the rigorous exercises are unnecessary from now on! "Pain can actually backfire and slow your progress," he said. 

When I got home, precious Nathan and Elena were here. We went to Osaka for dinner, then went to Learning Express to buy a few small toys they wanted.  It was a wonderful night!

Rabbi Rami Shapiro published an article in this month's Spirituality and Health online magazine--about why he loves dogs so much. 

You have to train a dog to be vicious. For humans, all it takes is religion, politics, or social media. Dogs are the ultimate Zen practitioners.

Luci, like all the dogs I know, is pretty Zen.  Dogs live in the moment and express their joy by wildly wagging their tails and jumping. 

"Freda's coming!" I tell Luci--and she bounds to the porch door and looks in the direction Freda comes from. 

Today I took her to get her heart worm pills at the vet's office.  Luci knows nothing of heart worms, but her nose is crazy with sniffing the ground before we walk in.  And then, surprise surprise, there are other dogs there and she's over-the-top happy to see them, big dogs, little dogs, doesn't matter.  Most dogs seems to instantly like each other.

Rabbi Shapiro continues:

"Some people have told me that I love my dog because my dog loves me. But that isn’t true. I think my dog loves anyone who feeds her, plays with her, walks with her, and does whatever it is she demands of them at the moment. She doesn’t love me because she is mine, she loves me because I am hers."

I like that.  I like belonging to a furry little Zen dog.  Unless there's another dog to distract her, she walks me very carefully, stopping at each step to make sure I'm keeping up.  She takes her job seriously--taking care of her limping human.  

Sunday

Today I visited Jan's house and saw her newly painted kitchen.  I shared one block with Freda who came to walk Luci.  Then we went to the grocery store.

One of the big surprises of having a little dog is that she is welcome everywhere.

Another surprise is how many conversations happen around her cuteness.  "She's so well behaved!" one couple said.  

I'm not bragging.  I have nothing to do with her good training.  I wish I could meet the person who trained her to walk so obediently on a leash and to watch my every step to make sure I'm okay.  She came to me like this in January and she just gets better and better.

Almost everyone looks at her and smiles, or bends down to pet her, or talks to her.  No wonder she loves shopping so much.

The only downside to shopping for me is that I have to go to bed afterwards.  The pain is aggravated by the walking and lifting and it takes a few pain-relieving pills to ease it. 

But by the time she's walked with Freda, visited with Carma, and followed me through HEB, she's as ready for a nap as I am!

WPC56 on Amazon

I hadn't seen my kids and grands since 2019 when Carlene and I went to Virginia for Christmas, so five happy days with them was great medicine!

Today I wanted to savor all the memories and hugs before starting the next chapter, so I spent the day sleeping and watching a BBC series (WPC56) about the first woman in an all-man police department in England.  

What a perfect series for a day of transitioning. It captured the fifties' music, clothes and cars while following the story of one, then two, women police offers navigating an all-male police squad, determined to make it in spite of everything. 

Bad things happen, else we'd have no story.  But the murders are rendered without gore, almost backdrop for the police work of solving the crimes and the skill of female investigators who at first are considered nothing more than coffee-bringers.  I recommend it for a lazy summer day--it's on Amazon. 

Friday Night

I had an incredibly wonderful week with my family!  In spite of a recurrence of leg pains brought on, I think, by rigorous PT, we managed to spend most of these five days together, enjoy some special meals (not one of which was cooked by me), play a few impossibly difficult games of Jeopardy designed by Marcus and Nathan, and play like San Antonio tourists.  

The Learys stayed in a Riverwalk hotel with a rooftop pool, so the kids got to do some swimming and we didn't have to do the usual bed and bath juggling--a brilliant idea of mine, I must say.

They left tonight to stay with Will and Day's dad in Helotes, and I miss them!

This was the final of many last day photos, Marcus holding Charlie and Tucker in the casita. 

Tuesday Night

 

The kids had a morning swim at the hotel while I did PT, then we met here and went to Panaderia for lunch.  These four kids are amazing in my eyes, each with a great big loving heart!

It's been such a happy day!

A wonderful reunion!

The Leary flight was slightly delayed but we waited at the bottom of the escalator to welcome them to Texas!

We went to Down on Grayson for a delicious late dinner and it was wonderful to be all together again since pre-Covid--including the three dogs, Tucker, Luci, and Charlie.  I'm a happy mama and grandmama tonight! 

Monday

Luci is a very social puppy.  Before my surgery, she wouldn't walk with anyone but me; now she has her own walking friends!  She's walked with Freda several mornings, giving me a little space to make up beds and take a bath without Luci's assistance.

Freda walks faster and further than I do, so Luci is in heaven.  All I have to say is "Freda's coming!" and she wags her whole self.

Tonight, we pick up the Leary family at the airport--all five of them including Tucker.  I just had a very strenuous PT session so I'm going to take a nap so I can stay up for the party.  This time the Learys are staying in a Riverwalk hotel so that the kids can have access to a pool and we'll all have more space to spread out. 

I took Luci to a dog groomer because she had beggar lice in her furry ears.  Because she grooms herself like a cat, she never needs shampooing but the trim neatened her up for meeting Tucker.  

The groomer has run her own shop for forty years, but arthritis in her hands and knees makes it impossible for her to groom more than four dogs a day.  She only does enough to pay the rent on the building and pays her house rent a month at a time.  

She's in a great deal of pain and waiting until her Medicare kicks in to get her knees done.  "I can't afford health insurance," she said.  She has no family--none!--and her only family, her own dog, is dying.  

Most of us have no idea how hard it must be to live alone, have no health care, and be in excruciating pain every day, counting the days until our 65th birthday.  

"I have to work and be with these dogs," she said.  "Because if I didn't, somebody like me would pass away." 

From Gibran's "The Prophet"

In today's "Brainpickings" ----

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

https://www.brainpickings.org/2019/09/09/on-children-kahlil-gibran/

Quick update

Yesterday I returned to physical therapy, much more painful and ultimately more effective than home PT.  Due to administrative red tape, there had been a two week break between the two and my leg was getting stiffer.  After a challenging hour-long session, I began to feel hopeful again and my new knee is moving with more ease today.

So now I'm in for the next long haul: three times a week for six weeks, plus three daily at-home exercise routines.

I'm not all sunshine yet; I'm moody, prickly, and cry easily.  Betty did some research and told me that post surgery depression is common.  Three hours under anesthesia together with pharmaceuticals--it takes a while to get all that out of the system. 

I can drive, clean my house, get in and out of the bathtub, and even walk Luci around the block, but I'm doing everything in slow gear. 

I love stories of unlikely friendships.  

"The Best of Enemies" on Netflix is that kind of story, based on actual events in North Carolina, 1971.  

After the burning of the elementary school for black kids, a man named Bill Riddick was invited to Durham to help the citizens decide the question of school integration.  

The leader of the local Klan and a spunky activist who fought for equal rights were asked to lead the group under Riddick's leadership,  employing his rules--both sides would listen to each other, what anyone said would be recorded on the blackboard, and the person sitting beside you at lunch "could not be the same color as you."  

We've all read about this type of group--among Israelis and Palestinians, liberals and conservatives,  and others resolutely opposed to each other.  A grassroots opening of dialogue.  Curiosity about the window through which the other looked at the world.  Leaving the echo chamber of soap boxes and megaphones and learning to listen.

No one could have predicted that two people who started out hating the other would make even a baby step towards friendship, but these two started a friendship that lasted for the rest of their lives. 

Surgery Update

Today the surgeon who gave me a new knee gave me a good report on my range of motion--so Yay!

Six weeks of PT and I'm hoping I'll be hopping around like a bunny rabbit. The best news of the day is that the left knee is going to last a bit longer--so I don't see another surgery on the horizon this year.   It's "almost bone on bone," but let's leave it alone unless it starts hurting, he said.