The last day of 2020

I woke up at 5:00 to the unusual and lovely sound of rain and distant thunder.  I put on my thickest socks and turned on the heat in the casita, then called Carlene while I went for my morning coke.  

I do not have a date for New Years Eve, so no need to doll up and put on fancy shoes.  Come to think of it, I've hardly ever had a date for New Years Eve--though I do remember Minnesota Bob and I celebrating Y2K in Minneapolis.  Most end of years have passed uncelebrated unless I hear fireworks, usually after I'm sound asleep. 

I read somewhere that we should do today what we want to do more of in 2021, so I'm thinking I'll venture out to the casita to work on two projects I started yesterday.  

When I go to the casita, I play like I'm going to work.  I usually leave the phone in the house. When I get in the zone, paint and glue on my hands, it's best to call back when I come back inside.  

But I'll keep the phone with me today, just in case some imaginary man calls me for a date we cannot have due to COVID.

We survived this grim year.  We survived almost four years of Trump--though countless others did not.  It's been a sad year and a frustrating awful four years, but we are ready to give birth now to a whole new year, the beautiful bouncing baby that is 2021.  

Be well, everybody.  Vaccines are coming. Fauci said that January could be our worst month yet, so we can't let our guards down just yet.  But as 2021 is born, there's hope for a return to some kind of normal.

Happy New Year!

Full moon and little moons all over the page

As Pam was about to drive out of the driveway last night, the big fat moon spread her golden light all over us. We mentioned that this might be a sleepless night--as full moon nights can be. 

So here I am at three in the morning, a light sprinkle outside, painting in a beautiful hand-made journal Pam gave me a year ago. It's so special that I've been saving until I had enough skill not to mess it up. 

Watercoloring is better than sleep anyway.  While I'm hoping to paint a bird soon, just for fun, right now I'm happy painting circles and shapes, the colors moving and spreading and bumping into each other on wet spots of paper.  

I now officially have enough art supplies to last me for the rest of this lifetime and another!

Day gave me the complete set of Arteza brush pens as part of my Christmas spread of art supplies, and Will gave me heavy black watercolor paper and a tin palette of artist quality watercolors. I'm about to start experimenting with metallic watercolors and white ink on black paper.  

Those of you who love art supplies understand: you can't die until you use them all up. So when Day gave me all these new markers and brushes and inks, she said her intention was to add 45 year to my life!

Another project for this week is gel printing a stack of papers with matte acrylic, then staining them with ink sprays and stains.  Until I watched a lesson on this technique a couple of nights ago, I didn't realize that acrylic paints come in matte finishes.  The chalkiness soaks up stains and ink sprays better than regular acrylics do, and the finished pages resemble mottled ancient walls.  

If the moon will cooperate, however, I think I'll get a few more hours of shut-eye before heading out to the play house.....

Hyperbole and Melodrama On The Blue Team

If you contribute to political campaigns, you feel good--for a minute.  Then you're bombarded with texts every day until election.  

While I'm totally supportive of, and hoping for a big blue win in Georgia,  I'm having an unfavorable reaction to the wheedling, whining tone of the texts that sound like they rolled off the Trump Tweet machine.  

WE ARE CRYING!

WE ARE OUT OF MONEY AND YOU ARE NOT GIVING!

NANCY PELOSI IS WRINGING HER HANDS!

NO ONE IN TEXAS IS CONTRIBUTING! 

MITCH IS GOING TO STAY IN OFFICE UNLESS YOU CONTRIBUTE IN THE NEXT 24 HOURS!

WE'RE ASHAMED AND DISAPPOINTED! 

HEY, THIS IS JOE.  CAN I CALL YOU RIGHT NOW?

Come on, Blue Party!   We've had enough drama, exaggeration, all caps, and exclamation points in the last four years to last a lifetime.  Please get a new team of writers next time around. 

A favorite. book of 2020

 

In the circle of my life, I'd buy just about any book with polka dots on the cover.  This one is intended for water color practice.  Each page is divided into grids like the one on the cover in which you can practice a different circle of watercolor a day.  

I've been doing mine since I got the book in October except I don't follow directions and do just one a day.  Usually I do a two-page spread or more every time I sit down to watercolor.  

Watercolor is a new medium for me, but doing circles has taught me a lot about how it moves, which brushes to use, and how to mix colors for different effects.

I'm not the only one who's drawn to polka dots.  In Ingrid Fetell Lee's book, Joyful, she writes that circles are the most universally joy-giving shapes.  Think of confetti, balloons, birthday cakes, candles, and all the round things that bring pleasure to your life. Sitting in a circle around a campfire. The sun and moon. Flowers and planets.  Faces and pies. 

2020 Hindsight

We did it.  In spite of everything including a pandemic, we cobbled together all kinds of different Christmases and Hanukkahs to cap off a 2020 nobody will ever forget.

We made the best of it in the ways we do.  

Even though I started buying family gifts in October, and even though I made a few cards, then pooped out, Christmas still seemed to sneak up on me a bit, thanks to the weather not matching the lyrics of the Christmas carols in the stores one bit. 

I phone-visited for an hour with Day, Tom, Jackson and Marcus.  The boys--even though one of them is clearly a man now and the other one not far behind--slept in the same room as they do every Christmas Eve, this year with Tucker.  

I can't find Tucker in this picture, but they said he was there. 

It was a Christmasy morning of phone visits with Carlene and friends and family, then a drive out to Helotes for a beautiful sunny afternoon, going inside only for a brief puppet show by Elena and Nathan. 

Gifts were given, letters and cards were written, and phones were busy all over the place.  Old friendships were renewed, babies were born who will be loved, and we all found, if we were looking for it, pockets of real joy even though it looked little like it used to.

Searching for a Furry Friend

The last thing I do every night is to troll the internet for little dogs.  I do not choose to own a dog bigger than I am or strong enough to pull me to the ground with her boundless enthusiasm.  

I found this one in the New Braunfels Humane Society but they say she isn't "socialized" yet.  I'm thinking that may mean that she bites (though look at that sweet face and see if you see a biter!) or that she wasn't chosen for the dog sorority of her choice.

Sweet Doggie

So then I went to another site, where I found a labradoodle, and I thought, Oh yeah, I like labs and I like doodles!

But when they sent me a picture of her mama and one of her daddy, they were both enormous.  This little guy has some big paws to grow into. 

So then I filled out an application to SNIPSA.  It took a while to specify that I want a young dog (6 months to 2 years) that is little and sweet and lovable.  Since I didn't have a spouse to name in the spouse line, they rejected my application, so I put in Mr. Nobody and it went right through. 

And Day, who has a shadow named Tucker, doesn't help when she lets Tom send me cute text photos like this one, calling Day the puppy's "day bed." 

I don't plan to pay thousands of dollars for a designer dog, but I do have my eye out for a homeless sweetie pie who will sprawl happily upon my shoulders! 

Basically I want a dog that remains a puppy forever, house trained with impeccable manners. 

When does Old begin?

Today TPR's noon guest was my friend Bonnie Lyons--talking about the book she and Deb Field wrote together, their interviews with a diverse group of talented women over 80. 

The book is called Wonderful Old Women.  They let me take pictures, against my protest that I'm an amateur, and it was fun to photograph these women in their houses and gardens and art studios.

Many of the women calling asked questions about how women are treated differently when they pass a certain age.  

But what is that age?  And how do you know that you are being perceived as old?

I noticed it when young women and old men doctors began calling me "Sweetie."  Women don't like being called "Girls" and "Dear" and "Sweetheart" by people we don't know.  What to do about it?  Bonnie and one of the callers had an idea: Call them that right back!

 

Free and Practically-Free Online Classes in Everything

I know I have mentioned Lyn Belisle's Online classes before, but it may be time for a tiny refresher.

Lyn's classes

Lyn lives and teaches right here in San Antonio.  Before COVID, I took two of her classes in person at her studio.  I liked them very much, but my learning style is such that I prefer online classes for a variety of reasons:

1. You can watch them any time you like and as many times as you like.

2. Lyn's classes are like personal tutorials and every single class is excellent and packed with information and extras and examples.  She teaches all these new-to-me things at a pace that feels like you're sitting down with a friend who's showing you exactly what to do, step by step.

3. These classes are very affordable--compared to similar classes you can find online.

4. Lyn is amazingly generous.  Not only does she give you everything you need, she directs you to other sites where you can get even more information and also free images--sites like Unsplash. 

The class I am beginning in the middle of this night is Photoshop Elements.  First, I bought the program (Adobe was running a sale and may still be), then I bought the class--for $29.

I've bought and enjoyed several of her classes, so I already know it's going to be exactly what I need: a class for beginners. 

If you're looking for classes in cooking or gardening or biking, I can't help you.

But if you're looking for classes in mixed media, watercolor, or gel printing, I can share my finds with you.  At the top of my list are any classes taught by Lyn.

You Tube is a great place to discover teachers in any subject.  Most of the experienced teachers there (you'll soon note that not all teachers are equally adept at teaching) will provide links to their websites and paid classes.  After you watch all their YouTube videos, you'll know if the teacher is a fit for you. 

Air Plants

 Carolyn inspired me to have a go at raising some air plants.  I already had the perfect parking space for them--I'd bought these vases once when Betty and I were in the North Georgia mountains and it was filled with bright red poppies.

Air plants are curious little dudes.  They like a misting every week or so, but they get their nutrients from the air around them. 

According to the internet:  

"Tillandsias  (air plants) are tropical plants that usually live for several years and will bloom and produce flowers only one time during their lifetime. The flowers are striking and brilliantly colored, and the bloom period will last several days to many months, depending on the species."

I found mine at Evergreen's and HEB, but I just now discovered you can get a ten-pack for $29 at Amazon, FYI. 

DAILY DOSE OF CUTE

 

Battening down the hatches

Yesterday, within 24 hours, six of Jan's friends got Covid.  One of them died this morning. He was about 80 and he got it from a Thanksgiving family gathering.

The numbers are rising alarmingly and those of us in the over-65 group should take this very seriously.  I know I've taken what I considered a few slight risks myself, but I'm ready now to batten down the hatches and resist, as much as I want to, seeing friends and family until we get the vaccine.

Kate suggested grocery shopping at seven when you can still smell disinfectant--and when few people are in the stores.  Double up your mask and stay home unless it's absolutely necessary to go out.  Visit with the people you love by phone, get tested: we all know the routine by now.  

As soon as we get our vaccines, we can make up for lost time.  I want everyone I love to be safe--and that includes you!

Tom Terrific

If you're old enough to remember, we used to have a Saturday Morning cartoon featuring Tom Terrific and his wonder dog,  Mighty Manfred.  Click on this link if you need a reminder:

Tom Terrific

When Day married Tom, I knew there was another Tom Terrific in our family.  I sometimes think of teasing him with this moniker because Our Tom Terrific is so awesome.  Then I remember that Tom's not old enough to remember the one in the cartoon.

Tom had a birthday on December 12th.  I sent him a sign I found on Etsy for his birthday present.

This morning I woke up to a text of thanks from Tom.  You will see his mighty wonder dog Tucker posing beside it!

Tucker is not yet ten pounds but he's a big presence in the Leary house!  Some days he's so full of energy that Day calls him a hurricane fur ball.  He loves to play-fight with the boys and go for walks with Papa Tom.  He loves to sit in Day's lap.  He can ring a bell on the door when he has to go outside.  And now this--he can pose on command???

I've not yet my grand-puppy, but I love my almost-daily "doses of cute" by text.  I'm hoping he's sitting in my lap next Christmas!

A You-Tuber I Just Met

When I want to put myself back to sleep, I usually turn on a You Tube video by some of my favorite gel printers, professionally produced and edited with good lighting, premium supplies, and stunning prints.

This morning  I stumbled upon an entirely different kind of pleasure--a country woman I would guess to be from Kentucky or Tennessee--who because she "can't afford fancy stuff" makes her own stencils and stamps.  

"Just go over to Wal-Mart and ask the man if he can give you some clean meat trays to make art out of," she says. "And go get a little girl's lace dress from the thrift shop and cut the lace up.  I got these dresses for a dollar fifty."  ("I'm not into short sleeveless lacy dresses myself, I just get them to make art out of.")

"I get me some foam pieces at Wal-Mart and cut them into all these shapes and glue them on cardboard," she says--showing her beautiful homemade stamps.  

I am tempted to tell her that, according to the experts, she's using about three times the amount of paint she needs, but I can't bear to diminish her obvious joy with a well-intentioned suggestion.  I admire her improvisation. She doesn't let her lack of "fancy stuff" keep her from making original and inventive textures.

Her prints would be amazing if she'd cut way back on the paint.  She squirts copious amounts of paint (from Wal-Mart) onto her gel plate and her beautiful homemade stamps slide around and create squishy and uninteresting prints.  But I find myself totally engaged for 39 minutes.  

As one viewer wrote in the comments section: These were amazing ideas! Best 39 minutes to watch...ingenuity at its finest.

She's having so much fun!  At the end, she tells us all to "have a bless-ed day and come back tomorrow for the lace show I'm going to make for y'all."

I'll be there.

This is for you, Victoria!

This text from Elena reminds me of all you did to help her get just the right Cockatiel.  She loves that bird.  He usually sits on her shoulder as she's doing homework.

Oh happy day!

 

The temperature dropped fast just before they left, so she wore her old Christmas sweater and is showing me her new braces. 

Maskless at Target

 The chili is made and I'm going to take--you guessed it--a nap!

But first I want to report on my quick trip to Target to get the one last thing I needed for lunch.

Just as I was walking in, a big man with an American flag mask around his neck walked in.  The greeter reminded him to pull his mask up and the man just kept walking, spewing profanity at the poor greeter who was about half his size.  He strode in with the arrogance of an intentionally mask-less man whose F.Y. seemed to be aimed at all us mortals in the store.  

I'm not sure how mask wearing can be enforced, but it was my first time to see someone refusing to wear one in a store, and I felt in his one gesture contempt that matched the contempt we've all seen from the White House.  I quickly purchased my one thing on a counter being disinfected between customers, then left--so I don't know if he was able to complete his shopping trip and check out.

Even at the Dollar Tree, where I popped in to get a can opener, everyone was masked.  At HEB, same thing.  

I've heard that masks are "optional" in some small towns and rural areas around here, but San Antonio people are almost always compliant.  

I felt so angry!  A young clerk tried following him, calling out, "Sire, please wear your mask," but he ignored her.  

  

Mike and I met some 13 years ago when we were just kids.  We met in Hope, Arkansas, he in a white pick up truck, me in my first Mini Cooper. 

Even though it went in all kinds of haywire directions, it was my happiest romance ever.  We danced in parking lots and parties and restaurants, whenever and wherever it popped into one of our minds. We rode his Harley through the Smokey Mountains and danced on Beale Street in Memphis.

Today is Mike's 75th birthday--even though he's not big on the whole birthday thing. 

His daughter, Jennifer, is visiting for a month and they are having a great time, including canvassing door to door for the Georgia senatorial race. "She got her daddy to do what I never could," I said.  He laughed.  He laughs a lot.  He's a happy man.

We haven't seen each other in a long time.  But whenever we talk, he always tells me I'm the love of his life.  

Some things are mutual--like that one--in spite of ourselves! 

Happy Birthday, Mike! 

Wednesday

A beautiful spring-like week, I've found exactly the man I've been looking for. He cleaned my yard and house to perfection and can lift anything too heavy for me.  He hangs mirrors and moves furniture and trims plants.   What's not to like?

Four of us friends of fifty years all drove in separate cars to Palmetto Park for a distanced birthday picnic for one of us, ate birthday cherry pie, and had a wonderful catch up from the past nine months. 

It's been an easy-going day of phone visits, a porch visit with Freda, and enjoying the cleanness of the house and yard.

I watched two fascinating series on HBO: Murder on Middle Beach and I'll Be Gone In The Dark--if you like murder mystery documentaries.  

 

Monday

This is a month of many birthdays.  Tomorrow I'll join friends for a socially distanced picnic at Palmetto Park to celebrate Beverly's.  Today is the birthday of my sweetest grandmother ever, Mimi, the following day Papa's. 

Mimi and Papa were born at the turn of the 20th century.  After their wedding, they rode to Papa's parents' house on a horse-drawn buggy.  I often wonder what they and my daddy would have made of this century, especially 2020.  

My grandson Marcus wrote an article for the school paper about video games and ways they are helping young people through the pandemic. 

https://fchsjagwire.com/3218/culture/xboxed-in-by-pandemic-students-turn-to-video-games/

Mimi and Papa wouldn't have a clue about video games, computers, cell phones, social distancing, e-mail, or social media.  They would, however, remember, their own pandemic of 1918 and two World Wars. 

My other grandmother, Mama Jim, had three of her sons serving in World War II at the same time.  No wonder she was plagued with aches and pains. 

Carlene and I talk every day and are going through this pandemic together, a thousand miles apart.  I can't imagine what it would be like to go through COVID scares and precautions without a phone to connect with people I love!

Today was a beautiful day.  Alfred cleaned my yard and I drove out to Helotes to deliver gifts to Will's family.  We stood outside and visited for a few minutes, Will and Nathan, the two dogs, and me.  

Conway, the Australian Shepherd, is a lovable big klutz.  Charlie, the little one, is definitely the alpha dog and Conway does whatever Charlie tells him to.  

Charlie is hilarious . He runs around and around so fast he looks like a blur of white.  If we laugh, he runs even faster! 

Circles

Most days I hang out in the big round tent of making things, playing like I'm a real artist. Gel printing, watercoloring, gluing, sanding, collaging, and cutting circles--that's the air in the mental balloon that keeps me happy most days in spite of everything. 

Using the same techniques I used on my armoire and circle paintings, I covered a little cardboard suitcase with circles. It is, if I do say so myself, pretty cute.

(When I sent Mike a picture of the armoire, he dubbed me "the goddess of eye candy," a moniker I love.)

Then I made little pools of watercolors--colorful circles in my watercolor journal--and you'd have thought I'd made a masterpiece based on my happiness quotient!  I never knew you could bump two wet circles of paint together and one would dance into the other. Or that dropping a few drops of metallic watercolor into regular watercolor would create little watery sparklers on the page.  So much to learn, so little time!

My love of circles started decades ago with a tomato.  I sliced the tomato and photographed it in a square format.  Then, after doing many tomato slices, and arranging them in a grid pattern, I moved on to peppers, onions, and Mexican pastries. 

One day, Will came home from school with a friend and saw bagels on the counter. "Hey, Mom, are these bagels to eat or take pictures of?"

To play with circles every day is the new part.  I'm obsessed, "following my bliss," as Joseph Campbell called it.

At the end of a play day, it's almost as much fun to put all my babies to bed for the night, the paint markers in one basket, the watercolors in another, and the brushes and pencils in their jars.

The only upside to veritable hermitage is that there's plenty of time to follow some of the blisses we never found enough time for before. 

I

This is now hanging in Day's
dining room. 
When I snapped this shot, it
was hanging on my turquoise wall. 

Pools of watercolors

Living Out Loud at 73

This is one of those days I'd have loved to invite a friend to ride with me (in my car, not tandem)  to a Hill Country town, to poke around in little shops, and to have lunch together in a restaurant.  (Remember restaurants?  The kinds that serve great salads and quiche and pie?)  Then we'd stop and sit on the bank of a river and feed stale bread to the ducks and talk, face to face, in person--all the kinds of things we took too much for granted, pre-pandemic.

Kate's birthday was both a taste of almost-normal and altogether wonderful, as she held court on her porch and people called, stopped by, texted, brought goodies from the bakery.  My contribution was Chinese food for lunch.  Her daughter brought dinner and her son woke her up singing a song on video while playing a ukulele!  

My gift to her was a little heart-shaped cactus.   We walked around her yard filled with plants and she sent me home with cuttings of so many succulents and three big fat lemons from her tree that I felt like it was my birthday!

I wish everyone could see Kate's transformed house.  If you drive down Russell, you can't miss it--a vivid turquoise house trimmed in pink and yellow, just beautiful, so Kate!  Her casita in the back is painted in identical colors and looks, as Kate says, like a Fisher Price toy house. 

"I feel just like I did when I was twenty," she said. "Except I know a lot more."

To a neighbor who said she liked the house a little better the way it was before the new paint, Kate asked, "Does it offend you?"

"Oh no, I love it,"the neighbor said. "It's just a little loud.....But then, you're a little loud yourself."

"Yeah,"Kate said. "I'm living out loud, Baby, and I'm loving it!"

Since she's planning on celebrating her birthday "all the way to Jesus," (the 25th), let me just say another great big HAPPY BIRTHDAY, Kate--and you just stretch it out as far as it will go!

December 1, 2020

It feels like we're in a time warp.  Days of the week are interchangeable.  Long and short--when applied to time--are not what they used to be.   

Usually Christmas music starts up in stores right after Halloween, way too early.  This year, I've not heard any at all.  

I spent Thanksgiving in my tribe of one--but Jan delivered me a meal and Kate gave me one the next day. so I got my yearly fix of turkey and dressing and all the trimmings.  

I drove past a store on San Pedro that sells evening dresses displayed in a brightly lit window.  Even in normal times, there are many layers of history between me and evening dresses, but in pandemic times, there's a whole new layer of history from a year ago reminding me that very few people are partying anymore, even young girls.  No proms, no dances, and probably no formal anything.  

I think in years to come, we'll remember this big gash in time and describe everything in terms of the pandemic: BC, COVID, and AC.  I hope AC hurries up and lands!

I'm off to get my every-three-month steroid shots in my knees and the last ones seem like they happened a year ago at least.  

Respair

A Way With Words (NPR) just sent me a new word in my inbox: Respair means "to have hope again." 

I'm sure everyone reading this blog knows exactly what they (and I) mean: We have hope again!  After hearing Biden's first six cabinet members speak, a group of professionals not the President's kids or groupies I felt respair.  

When Jan and I screamed that Saturday after the election returns finally came in. well--that was all caps an exhilaration degree of RESPAIR!

Kate called and told me that since there would only be three there this Thanksgiving, she was "cutting down her menu."  Then she named all the things she was making today.  About nineteen dishes instead of twenty???  One of the things she was deleting from her usual amazing menu was fruit salad--to which Lisa said, "Mom!  Fruit salad?  That's my favorite thing!"

My guess is that Kate and Lisa and David will get the whole meal deal, fruit salad included!  And I have been invited to come pick up a plate.  So all is well that ends well is what I say. 

I hope you all have a happy, albeit not in the usual way, Thanksgiving tomorrow!  

Rachel's story

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bLazQ2tlhyM

Please stay safe, everybody!  

Happy Hugging

Nathan is a very affectionate boy.  But he rarely actually hugs his sister--who adores him and vice versa.  

Will captured a rare hug between them, and you can see the joy on Little Sister's face:

Speaking of Little Sister: She does not need real glasses, but she wears reader glasses  as a fashion statement and because her Big Brother does.

A quiet week

 "It's been a quiet week in Lake Wobegone...." as Garrison Keillor used to say.

I quit taking statins (had been taking them for a month, exactly as long as my legs had been hurting) and going to physical therapy twice a week for my knees.  So far, it's up and down, but I'm confident that the combination of this particular form of physical therapy and stopping a drug that my body apparently doesn't like will alleviate the leg pain.

I belong to a small online writing group started by a member of a former writing group. It's a leaderless group of six.  One person gives us a prompt each morning and we write for about seven minutes--the equivalent of a timed writing.  

Today's prompt was "what it was like a year ago."  As I trolled through my blog entries to find November 18, 2019, then finally landed on the date, it seems like way more than a year ago!

https://aroadofmyown.blogspot.com/search?updated-max=2019-11-18T19:22:00-06:00&max-results=10

Time feels so different during the pandemic!

Friday the 13th

I am still enjoying the relief and relaxation that myofascial release physical therapy gives!  Pam walked out of her room and I out of mine at exactly the same time, both looking like woman noodles. Then we got in our separate cars and drifted home in two identical altered states, happy to let go of the pains we'd walked in with.

Nellie recommended a wonderful online class called Mandala Magic.  I ordered a compass and a watercolor journal and hope to spend the entire weekend making mandalas, inspired by our lovely teacher from Scotland, Julie Gibbons.  I hope to make some large and "wee" mandalas inspired by sun and moon and the landscapes in which we live. 

My new housekeeper, Alfred, came and cleaned my house to perfection!  I'm walking gently so as not to disturb the pristine floors. 

Carolyn sent me a photo of Adorable Annabelle in her new walking harness: 

It's been a very good day, and I'm turning in early.  Like right now.  

Pearls

I remember when The Pearl was an actual brewery and Pearl Beer was a thing.

Now it's a vibrant community of shops, apartments, weekly farmers' market, The Hotel Emma, all kinds of eateries, access to the River Walk Extension, lots of strolling people and their dogs.

After yesterday, I'll always think of The Pearl as the place where Carolyn lives.  Yesterday, we had a wonderful reunion at The Pearl where she now has a  new apartment near The Hotel Emma. 

We hadn't seen each other in half a lifetime, back in the 70s and 80s when our husbands and Frank(Joy's Frank) were professors at SAC until retirement.  Carolyn was Vice President of Santa Rosa Hospital, and they lived at Canyon Lake.  I always thought of Carolyn and Ray--and their daughter, Candy--as the real deal love story family.  Ray and Carolyn had married when she was 18 and he was 19, and when he died six weeks ago, they had been married for nearly 60 years. 

In September, I began following Ray's heartbreaking last days in daily letters from Carolyn.  After living and working with cancer for six years, the final days got so unbearable  that Carolyn wrote, "I beg for release for this wonderful man."  

In early October, she moved into a beautiful light-filled apartment at the Pearl, one floor down from Candy and Carlos.  We took our muffins from Bakery Lorraine to the balcony and got a start on catching up on since our last in-person visits. 

I loved seeing Ray's art work on the walls--so playful and smart and engaging. The more we talked about him and his work, the more I regretted not having spent much more time together.  Here are two:  (She let me take photos as she did her phone interview with the humane society.) 

The first is called OLD PAINT--and refers to both the horse and the paint can.

The second is called THREE GRACES--and includes a photo of Carolyn, Candy and Marissa--Carolyn's granddaughter. 

When Carolyn finished her extensive phone interview, she said, "It would be easier to adopt a child than it's been to adopt this sweet feral kitty."

So today she's picking up a kitty she's naming Annabelle.  She passed the long interview with flying colors! 

In the middle of the night, I re-read the final page of a book she's writing, and it was so moving that I wanted to share it with you all:

          He made me laugh every day of our lives together, even in the midst of this horrible cancer and his death.  He loved without a doubt his daughter, granddaughter and their men.  He loved the various dogs and kitties (particularly Begonia, who slept on his chest until she died at age 22).  He loved this world.  He loved me.  He loved me.  He loved me.  How privileged I am that he loved me.  He was the light in my life. 

  

A week after Election Day

 ...I had the privilege of having Nathan spend the day with me.  He set up his classroom in the casita and popped in between classes to play UNO.

When the school day ended, Will and Bonnie and Elena joined us for dinner and another episode of a Nathan-invented game of hard questions about medieval history, video games, and American colonial history.  I'm not sure which team won, as we asked repeatedly for clues.

Nathan has asked me, and I'm honored to say yes, to edit the book he's writing.  But first, he read aloud the first two well-written chapters, and it's going to be fun to be his editor!  Elena said, "I definitely want to read this book, Nathan!" 

They brought roses, balloons, bath bombs, and a little succulent from Elena.  They brought a card that made me teary.  And they brought--best of all, hugs from two little kids I adore. Some things are definitely worth the tiny risk, and hugs are at the top of that list! 

Nine Sunday Sparks So Far

1. I went to Wal-mart to get ingredients for some of Nathan's favorite foods (he's coming to spend the day with me tomorrow!) and there was a palpable lightness in the air.  People were smiling at each other.  I asked one woman wearing a Black Lives Matter mask if she was happy, and she said, "Yes Mam, SO happy!"

2. I asked the greeter the same question and he beamed, "I am so happy!"

3. So I asked everyone wearing a give-away smile or mask or T-shirt: Are you happy this morning? And everyone lit up like holiday trees and candles.  All of us early morning shoppers were sparkling together, hoping for something new. 

4. A woman was getting out of her pick up truck smoking a cigarette--and she asked me how I felt this morning and I said "Euphoric!" and she threw down her cig and clapped her hands. 

5. Percy at the drive-through window said she was thrilled, but Trump was a sore loser.  I said, "Yes, as expected, but I don't plan to mention his name again." 

6. I sent my first contribution to the senatorial candidates of Georgia--who could change the balance in Congress and take away the obstructionist power of the majority leader. 

7. My family and all my friends are thrilled.  This is a happy day for Democrats and the millions of  Americans who voted for Joe and Kamala. 

8. I read the writing of five writer friends and had a conversation with a friend I haven't seen in years. 

9. And now am relaxed and peaceful after a Yoga Nidra class.  

A Happy Kid Singing in the Shower

        I'm not sure it it had anything to do with the election or not, but if you can hear this video, you will hear Elena singing in the shower: "I'm gonna wash that man right out of my hair--and send him on his way!"

       Her dad happened to pass by the open door of the bathroom and capture it for me. 

       Jan and I celebrated on the porch after hearing Joe's and Kamala's speeches surrounded by people cheering and dancing and waving flags.  We feel like a weight has been lifted and we are very very happy!

       If you're looking for a shower song, may I suggest one from South Pacific next time you wash your hair?

 It's such a thrill to watch all the flags waving and the people celebrating en masse in what feels like America again!

I'm watching and listening to the people I know so well on MSNBC, Biden and Harris about to speak.  

After the past four years, we'll never take democracy for granted again.  

They did it! YAY Joe and Kamala!

My phone is exploding with joyous calls and texts!

We still have work to do in Georgia, but if we can get two more senators we'll be able to take a long long deep breath!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN

Happy 2020 Halloween, Everybody!

My morning started by going to McDonalds, the moon full and golden.  Two of the amazing Moipei Triplets whose concert in March wowed me--were dressed as twin witches.  It was too dark to take photos at that hour, but I went back later and asked Marta and Mary to pose.  They already have an agent in New York, but  COVID forced them to postpone their plans.  While they wait, they are the most glamorous window girls McDonalds ever had.

The day was spiced up with some phone calls, a bag of treats from Makken and Sebastien, and Carlos being here most of the day doing jobs in the casita.

Finally, today the armoire was completed and shutters and Japanese fans hung on the wall.  This is indeed  My Happy Place.  I moved back into my Real House for  Halloween sleeping and movies but I'll head out to the casita in the morning to see what else I can find to do!

Just when I thought the day was over, Jan brought me a scrumptious dinner of spooky food--deviled eggs (the best ever); monster meatballs, and a sugar skull pizza.  Jan is the queen of celebrations!   There's a witch on top of her house, and Kate is dressed as a glam witch--and Jan looks so cute with a spider crawling around her neck. (I wish I'd gotten a picture!)  In lieu of trick-or-treating, Jan made the boys a scavenger hunt for candy all around the house, inside and out!

I just watched I Am Woman--an excellent film about the life of Helen Reddy who died at the age of 78 this past September.  

And next on the movie night list: Rebecca,  recommended by Linda K. 

Do whatever it takes to treat yourselves tonight!  

Memories of Halloween Pasts With Nathan and Elena: 

And from the Leary clan, 1300 miles away: they have returned home from their one week beach retreat, just the four of them and Tucker--who is Day's constant shadow, I hear.