It takes a village

Refurbishing a little garage apartment takes a village.

Thanks to Edward, the painter; Elver, the electrician; and Mike--the end is in sight. I can hardly wait to get back from my multiple trips to Lowe's to listen to their man-banter.  Until today, I thought conversations among men might be competitive, maybe even show-offy.

Edward does everything but electricity--due to seeing his cousin electrocuted once on a job site.  "I saw him die right before my eyes," he says.

"That's why you don't ever see any old, bad electricians!" Mike says--which makes Electrician Elver laugh.

When Edward sees the bright green-apple paint I've chosen for the kitchen, he asks, "Are you sure you're not tripping back on the Sixties?"  Then he tells Mike, "I know Linda--she likes bright colors.  I've been painting for her for years."

They tease each other and joke around all day.  When Edward sees Mike's collection of CDs. they talk about soul music.  Edward literally re-enacts (like a one-man show) the times he went to Black Baptist Churches when he was a boy.  "I was the only Mexican kid there.  Everybody asks, 'Whose kid is that?' and they treat me like a king.  I mean fried chicken, macaroni and cheese, pee-can pie, cherry pie, you name it.  When I hear that music I try not to cry, but I have goosebumps all over my arms."

We tell him about Greater Hope Church in Georgia and the music we love there.  Mike tells him that he's met B.B. King, Jerry Lee Lewis, and Elvis

Edward is about to cry just thinking about being the only "Mexican Catholic" in a little Black Baptist Church on the East Side.

They talk about wrestling, music, what it was like being young.  They talk about their parents, especially their fathers.  Every once in a while, Edward or Mike will just start dancing to the music playing on the Bose.  Edward and I talk about our friend Julianne who died suddenly in October, and how we miss her.

At the end of his wiring job, after working two days with Mike, the Columbian electrician said to Mike, "I love you, my friend" and they hug each other.

Maybe men's conversations are not as different from women's as I'd originally thought.  They part hugging and thanking each other for good work.  They aren't afraid to show tears or say, "I love you, my friend."