Shine a light on it....

"Where the attention goes, the energy flows."  Mary Frances Weathersby, my yoga teacher of many years ago, used to say this.  It was her mantra: what we think about and attend to is where our energy moves.

Yoga teachers tend to say things like that: "Send your energy to your right shoulder," or "Imagine shining a light on...."

When I drive up to my house at night, it makes me happy to see my newly lighted pecan tree.  This was Mike's idea--an idea that would never have occurred to me.  I love seeing the shapes of its limbs and branches lit from below.  What is lighted in the night looks entirely different from what it looks like in the natural light of day.

During my recent weeks of medical tests, I've been less observant of my surroundings, all focused on alternately different spots in my body.  I didn't even notice, for example, that a third baseball field has been built down by the other two, a stone's throw from my house.   Driving home last night, I noticed that the grass was glowing and the trees--that had been there all the time--seemed like brand new trees.  It made me wonder: how much is right in front of us, but we're too busy or too preoccupied to even notice?

Yesterday I went to see Gabi--the most amazing energy shifter and healer! I walked in feeling ragged and achey, and I walked out two hours later feeling almost myself again.  The work she does shines a light on what hurts and then proceeds to make it better.  I have no idea how this works, but I've experienced it for years and it always works for me.

As a high school and college teacher, I remember the thrill of "seeing the light come on" in the faces of my students.  And I think of all the times I've learned something new that enlivened and enlightened a dark corner of my mind.

A friend or teacher or writer can say just the thing that shines a light on a situation. Or ask a question that illuminates a place in the  mind that I hadn't  thought to look.

"Where the attention goes, energy flows."

In the past couple of months, I've spent many hours in doctor's offices and waiting rooms. Parts of my body have been viewed through machines--x-rays, MRI, and microscopes.  While these kinds of observations are sometimes critical, the cumulative effect of so much scrutiny was starting to make me feel like a sick person.   All my energy was flowing in that one direction, leaving little space to create something new.

Today, invigorated by Gabi's work yesterday (and an excellent report this morning from the pulmonologist), I drove out to La Cantera to shop for clothes and shoes. I felt like I'd re-entered the world of the living and healthy.  The lights are coming back on. Colors are vivid again.

Something shifted today.  I felt energetic, hopeful, and happy.  I let go of some weighty fears and enjoyed the feeling of walking around alone trying on clothes--the kind of thing people do when they expect to keep living.